In good times and in bad...

My husband was in a (beautiful) wedding this weekend and during the ceremony, I found myself drifting back to our wedding day almost three years ago.  As our friends exchanged their vows, all I could think of were ours - how we were so excited and eager to repeat word for word after the priest and ultimately say "I do".  It's funny though (it's actually not funny at all - I'm starting to really despise that phrase!), because not for a second during my wedding ceremony did I ever, in a million, trillion, gazillion years, think that today - almost three years later - I would still be baby-less, that my heart would be filled to the brim with pain and heartache and that the one thing I longed for pretty much my whole entire life would be so, so far out of my (and my husband's) reach.

I remember feeling so relieved when I got to the end (front?) of the aisle to meet my very soon-to-be husband.  I had been so anxious all day - and that anxiety instantly dissipated the second he took my hand in his.  We were giddy.  We were excited.  We were proud of ourselves for the hard work we put into making our wedding day come together.  We were (and are!) in love.  And because of all of our "I'm-too-excited-right-now-to-focus!" thoughts, I'm sure we both weren't really thinking too much about our priests' words of encouragement and advice as he spoke about what a marriage is and what a marriage should be - how we should be there for one another... in good times and in bad.

So, while I couldn't tell you exactly what the priest's message was to us that day, I do know the gist of it.  During our cereomy the priest had us each take a sip of wine, which tasted bitter yet sweet -and symbolized just that.  There will be sweet and happy times in our lives (such as our wedding day), but there will also be bitter and hard times in our lives (such has been the case for the past two years of dealing with infertility) and together, we will help eachother through the good, and through the bad times.  And this weekend while listening to the Justice of the Peace speak and deliver his own message to my dear friends, I was thankful for the reminder of our own message from our wedding day.  It left me teary eyed.



Because even though we've dealt with two years of heartache and pain, we've dealt with it together.  We've shared sweet times together and (alot of) not-so-sweet times together.  We've cried on one another's shoulder.  We've hugged and embraced every time we got bad news and each time, we held on to one another longer and tighter.  We've prayed together.  We will get through this somehow or another and while right now I have no idea how our infertility story will end, I'm beyond thankful that my husband is the man with whom I'm weathering this (really bad and really scary) storm.