Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Baby Shower

My baby shower was this past Saturday...
Wow, those are seven words I never, EVER thought I'd write.
It was amazing, beautiful and so very special... But, it was also awkward, strange and weird.  I mean, I almost felt badly that I was celebrating my pregnancy - my two miracles that I fought so hard for - when I know that so many others so truly deserve to have a day like I did on Saturday.  After so many years of heartache and enduring failure after failure, it's sometimes hard to embrace my own happiness. 
But, the thing is, it was a happy day.  A day that I will never forget.  A day that my family and closest friends showered me and my boys who are already so incredibly loved by so many.  I am lucky.  They are lucky. 
I'm not sure when I'll awake from this dream, because that is truly what it feels like - a beautiful dream.
The shower was held at a very special venue - the historic hotel where I had my bridal shower, Wedding and now baby shower.  It couldn't have been more perfect...
My mom brought the bassinet that she used for me when I was a baby to hold baby books that guests were asked to bring in lieu of a card - our boys' library is already so full!
Everything was just-so from the favors to the tables and the sweet baby pictures of me and Nick as well.
We played the timer game while I opened gifts - when the timer went off, the person whose gift I was opening was able to choose a bottle of wine.

I had my closest friends and family, most of whom travelled from out of state, there with me and that truly made my heart swell.  These are the people who prayed for me, consoled me and loved me throughout the worst times of my life the past three years.  They were there for me and supported me more than I think they'll ever know.  And how much more special does it get to have had my 94 year old Nana there with me?!  Blessed.  I am so, so blessed!
Lucky doesn't even begin to describe it... I am more than lucky, more than blessed... I never imagined that I could feel such happiness.  I am so incredibly grateful and thankful to God for answering my prayers.  He is the only explanation for this amazing turn of events in my life.

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Babies Bump and 27 Week Update


The look of exhaustion is spot on :)
How far along:  The above pictures were taken at 27 weeks 4 days.
Total weight gain?  I'm still up 29 lbs.  I'm trying to pack on as many pounds as I can in hopes that these little guys will reap all of the benefits!
Maternity clothes?  Yes, yes and yes. The non maternity leggings that I so loved are not really working for me anymore so I recently bought a handful of maternity lounge clothes that I'm thinking might be good for the hospital stay.  By the way, I can't even believe a hospital stay... for BABIES... MY babies, is something I'm even thinking about!!
Stretch marks?  Still none... Not sure how I've escaped them so far!
Sleep:  Still stinks.  Right now I love sleep but also hate it.  My right nostril is completely blocked every night.  I wear Breathe Right strips but even they don't really do the trick.
Best moment this week:  My shower.  Holy cow!!  MY shower!  How can I be this lucky?  I really feel like this has all been a dream.  It's the only explanation for what is happening in my life right now (shower post and pictures to come)...
Miss anything?  Coffee Oreo ice cream!  I'm on a pre-three hour glucose test diet right now that is high in carbs (which is odd) and includes other examples of dairy and also fruit.  Ice cream isn't on the list so I haven't indulged in three days... And I'm dying!  My test is tomorrow and I'm praying that I will pass!
Movement:  Best feeling in the world.  And is reassurance that my sweet little miracles are doing well!
Food cravings:  Still none.  Actually, I lied... coffee Oreo ice cream!
Anything make you queasy or sick?  Still nothing in particular, but anything can do the trick.  I tend to fight some light nausea in the morning but for the most part, I've been cured of the debilitating nausea that plagued me for the first oh so many weeks of this pregnancy!
Gender:  LOVE my Boys!
Labor Signs:  None.  Phew!
Symptoms:  The same… but I'm adding in general discomfort.  I hate saying/typing that but it's the truth.  It's NOTHING that I wouldn't deal with for my  baby boys, though!  
Belly button in or out?  In.  But it is really starting to stretch- my belly button hole is not nearly as deep!
Wedding rings on or off?  Officially off.
Looking forward to:  Hopefully passing my 3 hour glucose test and entering my THIRD TRIMESTER!!!  Wow. Just wow....  I really am living my dream.  Praise God!

Friday, April 25, 2014

Babies Bump and 25 & 26 Week Update


How far along:  The above pictures were taken at 25 weeks 3 days and 26 weeks 3 days. 
Total weight gain?  As of my doctor's appointment on Tuesday, I am officially up 29 pounds.
Maternity clothes?  Uh huh.  Some maternity clothes feel tight, actually.  And I'm officially wearing Nick's tee shirts to bed.  Oy!  
Stretch marks?  Still none... but my belly is a-gettin'-big so I'm sure they're on their way!
Sleep:  Nose congestion is the worst.  I'd rather get up 10 times a night to go to the bathroom than not be able to breathe.  But it's worth it... it's ALL worth it!  One of my sweet friends that I "met" through my blog and then who I really met in-person, IN Colorado, sent me the most adorable every day prayer book for my boys.  Nick and I take turns each night before I hit the hay to read a prayer to them.  It's become my favorite part of the day.
Best moment this week:  Week 25: A new car!!  Nick and I both drive Jeeps and his had been driven into the ground.  It was in rough shape and seemed to constantly be in the shop.  My Jeep has also seen better days but wasn't in as bad shape as Nick's.  So, we finally decided to trade his in for a new one and I've been the lucky one who gets to drive it :)

Week 26: SO many special things happened this week!  I spent a few days down in Connecticut with my parents - my dad felt his grandsons kicking for the first time!  My Nana has also been in town and we had such a great time talking about her great grandsons and of course doing some shopping.  My babies are so lucky for the best grandparents and for the best great-Nana that there ever could be!

Week 26 has been quite busy... From CT, we headed back up to MA for the Boston Marathon and to cheer on my sister (while here, my Nana got to test out the rocking chair in the babies room).  I'm so proud of my sister - she's quite an inspiration and still looks AH-MAZING after running 26.2 miles!!

Oh!  And we got our first 3D ultrasound picture this week, too!  Here's Camden, who to me, looks just like his Daddy.  Austin wouldn't cooperate and had his little head smooshed right against my cervix (both babies are around 1.75-2 lbs and both are currently head-down).

Miss anything?  Right now I miss bagels and ice cream!  I learned that I failed my glucose test this week and so I have to go back on Wednesday for the 3 hours test.  My fingers are crossed that everything comes back OK, but until then I'm trying to eat as many vegetables and as little bagels as possible.  Boo!
Movement:  My boys are destined to be soccer players... They sure are kickers!
Food cravings:  Still none.
Anything make you queasy or sick?  Still nothing in particular, but anything can still do the trick.
Gender:  LOVE my Boys!
Labor Signs:  None.  Phew!
Symptoms:  The same… linea nigra, some ligament pain on my left side in my hip/upper leg area, nasal congestion, restlessness, some back pain and I've developed a weird "rash" on the palm of my hands... My doctor says it's nothing to worry about so I'm trying not to!
Belly button in or out?  In.  But it's starting to really stretch.
Wedding rings on or off?  Officially off.  I did buy a fake ring to wear though, because my left ring finger felt incredibly naked!
Looking forward to:  My shower this weekend... Holy moly.  It can't be true.  I must be dreaming.  What?!?!

Thursday, April 24, 2014

Meet DeNae - National Infertility Awareness Week - Blog Swap

I'm so happy to be participating in Lauren's blog swap in honor of National Infertility Awareness week.  Certainly, this week of awareness is so very close to my heart.  I've been paired with DeNae, who, though she isn't someone who has suffered through infertility herself, the support she lends for those who have is remarkable.  Her post below, brought a tear to my eye because she understands and she wants to help by spreading the word.  Thank you, DeNae!
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The Chinese character for woman is supposed to look like a woman with a baby in her lap. In the bible, women are cursed with pain during childbirth. When we meet married women who look to be in their child-bearing years, one of the first questions we ask is if they have kids.

Womanhood is so wrapped up in motherhood. And that seems fine and dandy until we realize that having a baby isn't always easy and, in fact, many couples struggle with infertility. Maybe they talk about it or maybe they say they don't want kids or maybe they hide it behind little jokes, but the pain and the devastation are real.

I have not struggled with infertility. It is one of those big questions. Why are some children born into such horrendous poverty while others will never want for anything? Why is getting pregnant and staying pregnant so easy for some women and so seemingly impossible for others? I have friends who have struggled and friends who continue to struggle. Friends who struggle in silence and sadness. Friends who face the reality of arms that so badly want to hold a baby, raise a family, share their love with children, but can't. I did nothing right and they did nothing wrong, but our paths to parenthood are so very different. I wish it weren't so.

So many women handle it privately. Feel that pain privately. That is one of the reasons I am so thankful for women like Aubrey who share their story and help people realize they are not alone. Who give people hope and erase the stigma, share in the heartache and the pain. Her story is heartbreaking and beautiful and I am so excited for her and her husband as they face this new adventure in parenthood.

Being a mother is such a huge part of who I am. That is easy to see and understand because I am almost always surrounded by four loud and lovable kiddos. But being a mother is also a huge part of many women who don't have kids yet and wonder if they ever will. It is in their heart. Their arms await the gentle heft of a newborn. The cry that means hunger. The first tooth. They ache for it. All of it. 

There is strength in numbers and strength in telling our stories of infertility and motherhood and the beauty of life and the heartache of life and all the in between stuff, too. That's one reason I am so appreciative of the chance to swap blogs with Aubrey today to let more people know about infertility and the real people that are affected by it every day.

Today let's celebrate all the things that make us women. The way we laugh and the love we share and the meals we cook and the stories we tell. Today let's lift up a friend in prayer or give her a hug or take her out for coffee or send her a kind text. Today let's remember that we don't often know the pain people hold inside so let's be gentle. Today let's share knowledge and information and stories about infertility to break the silence and show support. 

Let's start with today. But then let's do it tomorrow and the day after and the day after until it is just a way of life. 

You can usually find me blogging over at
Come on over for a visit.

Sunday, April 6, 2014

Babies Bump and 23 & 24 Week Update


How far along:  The above pictures were taken at 23 weeks 3 days and 24 weeks 3 days.  I cannot believe that I made it to this huge milestone in my pregnancy... viability! 
Total weight gain?  As of my doctor's appointment last Tuesday, I am officially up 23 pounds.
Maternity clothes?  Oh yes.  I still have a few tee shirts out that are non-maternity and I've reached the point where wearing them is just plain uncomfortable.  I'm loving stretchy maxi skirts and maternity tank tops right now!  
Stretch marks?  Still none, but I've been so horrible about applying lotion or cocoa butter to my belly that I know they're probably not far off from appearing.  I can feel my belly stretching these days - it's become itchy - so I guess at this point it's just a waiting game.
Sleep:  Eh.  Nose congestion, please go away!  I can't breathe at night!  It's normally one nostril that's blocked but I end up waking up to use the bathroom and then when I'm trying to fall back asleep, I can't because all I can hear and focus on is the whistling noise coming from my nose because it's so blocked.  While sleeping at night isn't all that great, I'm really enjoying my mid-morning naps!
Best moment this week:  Week 23: Getting the boys' elephant name plaques!  I love seeing their names :)
 Week 24: Spending the weekend in CT with my parents (Happy Birthday Papa!!!) and attending a baby shower for one of my best friends.  This is the first baby shower I've been to in three years where I didn't cry before or after.  I was really able to not only enjoy myself but truly feel happiness for my sweet friend.  Now, please excuse me as I go pinch myself to make sure this life that I'm living is real...
Miss anything?  I still miss being able to breathe out of both nostrils at night, but truthfully, I would put up with that for the rest of my life for these sweet little babies.
Movement:  This truly has to be the best feeling in the world.  Feeling my miracle babies is a dream come true.
Food cravings:  Still none.
Anything make you queasy or sick?  Still nothing in particular, but anything can still do the trick.
Gender:  LOVE my Boys!
Labor Signs:  None.  Phew!
Symptoms:  The same… linea nigra, some ligament pain on my left side in my hip/upper leg area, nasal congestion, restlessness and I've officially entered the weeks of back pain.
Belly button in or out?  In.
Wedding rings on or off?  I'm no longer wearing my wedding rings... They're tight and I worry that they are going to get stuck.  So for now, the ring finger on my left hand is naked!
Looking forward to:  I'm so looking forward to watching (and feeling) my belly continue to grow, to feeling my sweet boys more and more and to every single thing that is to come along with this miraculous pregnancy! 
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