And well, speaking of my meds... which one of you is it?
Since starting Lupron and vivelle patches, I have literally had a splitting headache every single night as I lay down to go to bed and every morning as I open my eyes. I can't figure out which one of these meds seem to be causing this mind numbing head throbbing... I've been on both Lupron and vivelle patches before and I most definitely do not recall this side effect. I'm scheduled to increase the vivelle patches from one to four over the course of the next six days, so if my headaches worsen, then surely, it's from the vivelle (?). Anyway, regardless of which one of these evil medications is causing my headaches, I do know this: they.are.horrible. HORRIBLE, I say! But, I'll gladly take on a constant headache if a baby is what comes from all of this. Gladly!
So, now, all of this leads me to my thoughts on my upcoming FET. Oh.My.Goshhhhhh am I scared! S-C-A-R-E-D. Terrified, actually. I just cannot imagine this turning out any other way than it has for every single one of my past IVF cycles. An outcome with two lines is just unimaginable to me. Unimaginable in every sense of the word. I want to be positive about this, but I just don't know where to find that positivity, so instead I just try not to think about it at all. And so, that's where I am. I'm pretending that my FET isn't just right around the corner, because the fact that it's right around the corner means that I'll know if this worked pretty soon. And again, that is terrifying.